


Our Future

by AkatsukiShin



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: Drama, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Non-Graphic Rape/Non-Con, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-21
Updated: 2014-02-07
Packaged: 2018-01-09 12:52:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 14,638
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1146221
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AkatsukiShin/pseuds/AkatsukiShin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>[A Compilation of Short Stories] One's future is never within one's expectation. As humans, we could only dream. We despair over our dream, we rejoice for our dream. Toyed by the twist of fate, this is the story of those trying to hold close what is dearest to their hearts, to protect their little dream of the future.</p><p>WARNING: The first story contains (rather implicit) rape/non-con.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Strength for You

 

 

 

_Cover Art by[Erda Enos](http://erdaenos.tumblr.com/)_  

 

On my head was a black _fedora_ hat, crowning my silky smooth blond hair. Covering my tall, well-proportioned body was a light goldenrod shirt under a black coat, matched with black trousers and a leather belt. All was well, all was set. If anything, I must say all was perfect without even a single glitch to find.

Flash! Flash! Flash! I could still remember how the shutter flickered with that figure of mine right in the focus. They asked me for a smile, so I gladly gave it to them, a smile powerful enough to send my picture to the front cover.

 

_But I could no longer smile like that._

 

With both hands bound together and chained to the corner of the bed, all I could do was lying hopelessly on the disheveled sheet with only a piece of shirt covering my tainted body. My swollen eyes could only stare at that large picture of mine, plastered on the wall right across where I was. How many days had it been since I was first brought in here? In this room with minimum lighting, even looking at the clock attached on the wall above the door was difficult. But it was probably for the best. This way, I would not be able to see how terribly wretched I was right now.

I had been kidnapped, this much was already obvious to me. On the day I was going to meet Aomine-cchi, someone attacked me when I was on my way to the meeting spot with a stun gun and brought me to this place while I was unconscious. I did not know who he was, but just one look at this room gave me enough clues to figure out what kind of person he was.

An overly obsessive fan; a stalker. Even though it was dim, I could see pictures of me everywhere, as though the room itself was a sea of posters and photographs, covering every single inch of the wall. I had always been proud of my pictures, but now that I had seen all of these, perhaps I would never want to see a camera again for the rest of my life.

 

Tap. Tap. Tap.

 

…He had returned.

The moment my ears caught the sound of his footsteps approaching, I could feel cold shiver running down my spine. But even so, there was nothing I could do in my current situation. On the first few days, I was devastated. I struggled with all my might, trying to scream and bang on the wall in hope that his neighbor would hear the noises I was making. But all those efforts were in vain. If anything, my retaliation only brought him to the conclusion that he had to bind my hands and gag my mouth.

“I’m home, Kise-kun.”

He said that with such a gentle and kind voice, as though he treasured me so much. From his point of view, perhaps that was indeed what he thought he was doing to me although what I felt was obviously the opposite.

“I’m sorry to leave you alone. Did you wait long?”

The man whose identity remained unknown to me settled down on the bed, caressing the side of my face with one hand. I thought I had gotten used to this, yet the feeling of disgust when his fingers touched my skin was simply too strong that I couldn’t help but retreat further away from him.

“Now, now… There’s no need to be shy. Today, too, I will indulge myself in you. You’ll enjoy it as usual, won’t you?”

 _No way!_ I screamed as hard as I could, but what came out from my sealed lips were nothing more than meaningless mumbles. The man chuckled upon witnessing my reaction, as though he was savoring the sight of something very adorable. And not long afterwards, it began…

“Kise-kun is very beautiful. I’ll never get bored looking at you every day,” he said with a grin while ramming into me. It was painful to realize that my body responded to his stimulation, but more than that, my heart was the one hurting the most.

 

_…Aomine-cchi…_

 

In the midst of such despairing pleasure, I recalled his face.

A year had passed since Winter Cup and the both of us were on our second year in high school now. Ever since then, Aomine-cchi had been slowly returning to his old self and even though he didn’t say anything, I know that he, too, was happy about it. We returned to being friends and rivals, just like the old times.

Yes. Just like the old times… Even that day, we were supposed to meet and have a little game of one-on-one. If only this person hadn’t done this to me, I would’ve been able to meet him. I would’ve been able…to meet Aomine-cchi…

“Hmm? What is this, Kise-kun?” that man grabbed my chin and forced me to look at his face. He was definitely displeased. “Why are you crying? Are you telling me that you’re unhappy?”

I had heard about this in books and movies that to people like him, there might not be any common sense left in his mind. I think it should be obvious that I would not feel any sort of happiness from being kidnapped, but apparently he thought of it differently.

“What are you still unhappy for? I’ve treasured you this much and it’s still not enough?!” he began to lash out, “What else do you want me to do?!”

 _Let me go_ …was what I would like to tell him. But with my mouth sealed, all I could do was to throw him a glance. Surprisingly enough, this time he appeared to understand what I meant and he definitely wasn’t happy about it.

“No!” he pounced down on me, ramming hard inside that I nearly cried from the pain, “You are mine! I won’t let you go! Did you hear me? You’re mine!”

Perhaps he noticed that even in my desperation, I still did not show any sign of resigning to him. There was a brief moment of silence between the two of us, and it was at that time I noticed his hands were crawling towards my neck.

“…It can’t be helped then…” he whispered under his breath, “I didn’t want to do this, but if I can’t make you mine while you’re alive, then I’ll just have to make you mine when you’re not alive.”

And just like that, he grabbed my throat and pressed his fingers on my skin with all his might. While he was at it, his lower part continued to violate me without showing even a little bit of mercy. As my lungs were slowly deprived of air, I could feel my consciousness began to escape my grasp.

 

_“Man… And here I thought you’ve gotten a little better.”_

 

My eyes went wide. I could hear his voice ringing in the back of my mind and all of a sudden I could see the court at the park we often visited. Aomine-cchi was standing there, holding a ball in his hand. And I, too, was there… Desperate and frustrated of being defeated once again.

 

_“I’m not done yet! One more time!”_

 

_“No way, that’s enough for today. Don’t you even realize what time it is?”_

 

_“Hmph… I’ll win next time.”_

_“Ha! I’d like to see that happen.”_

 

Aomine-cchi was strong. No matter how hard I tried, when I thought I had gotten a little stronger, he was already soaring to a place much higher than before. But even in that situation, I was having fun. As long as I could stay by his side, even though this feeling of mine would never reach him, it was enough for me.

 

_“By the way, Aomine-cchi… What are you going to do after graduating from high school?”_

_“Ha? Why are you asking me that all of a sudden? But, yeah… I guess it’s already the time for that, huh? We’re already second years, after all…”_

_“I’m…going to an aviation school.”_

_“What?”_

_“I want to become a pilot. I’ll fly higher than Aomine-cchi, so you can’t catch me this time.”_

_“Is that supposed to be a pun? Well, work hard then. Don’t bring your passengers down.”_

_“So mean! And, anyway… You haven’t answered my question!”_

_“Let’s see… If you can beat me next time, I’ll tell you.”_

 

…I suppose…I would never know what his answer to that question would be. I…would probably never see him again. If only…I could meet him that time… If only, for the last time, I could have a one-on-one with him…

 

_Aomine…cchi…_

 

If only…I could tell him…that I had liked him…this whole time…

 

* * *

 

Kise was kidnapped.

On his way to our meeting spot that day, he was attacked and hauled away to the kidnapper’s house. It wasn’t until two weeks later that they finally found him, and at that time, his condition was so horrible that the police immediately admitted him to the hospital.

It was apparently the work of an obsessive fan, and while he was there, Kise suffered from lack of sleep and food deprivation. Perhaps he was actually given some food, but it was very likely that Kise himself refused to eat. To top it all off, they also said there were obvious signs of sexual abuse. Simply put, the perpetrator did not only kidnap, but raped him, as well.

Three days had passed since they found him and here I was, standing right in front of the private room where he was admitted to after being rescued. I reached for the knob, turning it slowly and pushed the door ever so carefully as not to make too much noise. The smell of medicines entered my nose as soon as I stepped into the chamber entirely covered in white, and next to the window, I saw his figure lying motionless on the bed.

Truth be told, even though I had already expected he would look ill, to see his current condition with my own two eyes were quite painful. The popular model who always looked so handsomely perfect and bright, both in pictures and actuality, was nowhere in sight. The Kise Ryouta before me now was so thin and fragile, as though he could break any moment even at the slightest touch.

“Kise…”

I called his name. His long eyelashes fluttered and he opened his eyes, showing a pair of gold spheres hidden behind the lids that quickly caught my figure.

“…Aomine…cchi…”

“Hey, it’s me.”

I pulled a nearby chair and sat next to him. As expected, even his voice sounded so weak. On his wrists where he was said to be chained were thin scars. Just with a single look, I could tell that the wounds used to be bleeding. The corners of his mouth where he was gagged for a long time were slightly swollen. On his neck, there was a darkened mark, forming the shape of human hands. Indeed, if the police were to be a minute late, he would’ve departed to another world.

“How are you feeling?” I asked him.

“Much better than before,” to my words, he bitterly smiled, “They said I could go home in three days.”

“Well, that’s good to hear,” I replied, “I met your sister in the hallway. She said she’s going back home for awhile to bring some change of clothes.”

“I see. My family has been taking turns to take care of me. They’ve also attended meetings with the police in my stead while I’m here.”

As we spoke, I took the chance to get a better look at his face. Even though he smiled and talked like he normally did, it was impossible not to notice his swollen eyes.

 

_Have you been crying this whole time?_

 

I wanted to ask him, but the words simply could not leave my mouth. Were you scared when you were locked in there? Did you try to escape? Did you call for help? Was it painful when he raped you? How did you even manage to stay sane after all that? How did you hold yourself together the entire time you were there?

“Aomine-cchi…” his voice, calling out my name meekly, quickly cut the line of endless questions running inside my head. However, he did not look at me in the eyes. It was as though his sight was wandering somewhere to the distance outside the window while his voice trembled as he continued. “Aomine-cchi… I’m sorry…”

“Ha? What are you apologizing for?” my brows furrowed at his sudden remark.

“I’m sorry… If only I had been more careful… I made you wait, didn’t I?”

What had gotten into him all of a sudden? I couldn’t understand why he’d start apologizing for something that wasn’t his fault, but when I looked at him, I noticed his hands were shaking.

“Kise, what’s wrong with—”

“D-Don’t touch me!”

As soon as I held out my hand, he rolled over to the other side of the bed; his back facing me. His sudden reaction was surprising, but even so I did not fail to catch a glimpse of his shoulders shaking.

“Kise.”

“Don’t touch me,” his voice trembled, “Don’t touch me, Aomine-cchi.”

“Why can’t I touch you?”

“I…am dirty… If you touch me… Aomine-cchi…will also become dirty…”

It was probably a lie when he said he was feeling much better, but it wasn’t meant to deceive the people who visited him. He might have been trying to reassure himself by telling those words over and over again, to erase the horrible memories from those fourteen days. However, before I could even say anything, his next words immediately stopped me in my tracks.

“I like Aomine-cchi,” he said with quivering shoulders, “I like Aomine-cchi. I’m sorry you have to hear this from me. I’m not even a girl and I’ve been stained by another guy. But I promise this will be the last time we meet, so I want to tell you. I’ve liked Aomine-cchi this whole time. I’m really sorry…”

Was it weird of me not to be surprised at his confession? For some reason, this whole time, too, I had had a hunch that he had been harboring some sort of feelings towards me. But still, I had never expected he would actually confess. Not at his current situation at least.

“Kise,” once again I called out to him. He refused to face me, but no matter how hard he tried to conceal it, I could hear his faint sniffles from the other side of the bed. “Kise, look at me.”

“No,” he buried his face on the pillow.

“Look this way,” I grabbed his shoulder and forcefully turned him around. It was rather cruel, considering that he was still shaken by the entire incident, but it was the only way I could think of so he wouldn’t brush me off. “Who said you have the right to decide whether we’re going to meet again or not?”

Kise stared at me with confused eyes. Even though he didn’t say anything, it was obvious that he had prepared himself for the worst. So that meant he was actually planning not to see me ever again after this, huh?

“Doesn’t Aomine-cchi…feel disgusted at all…?” he asked straight out in disbelief. The look in his eyes told me that there was a tiny bit of hope growing in his heart, but at the same time, it also meant he would crumble to the point of no return should I deny him right here and now.

“Why should I?” without a pause, I quickly responded to his naïve question, “No matter what that bastard’s done to you, it wasn’t even your fault to begin with. You’re not dirty. You’re not a slut or a whore. You’re Kise.”

His eyes widened upon hearing my statement. Those gold spheres of his were soon drowning in transparent, warm liquid dripping down his face. He probably never expected to hear that. But, well… He hadn’t even heard the last of it yet.

“Listen,” I brought my face closer to his, “Didn’t you say you’re going to beat me the next time we have a one-on-one? If you don’t beat me, I won’t tell you my plans for the future. Aren’t you curious at all?”

“I’m…curious…” he mumbled. A streak of red colored his cheeks as he tried to shift his gaze away from me.

“Then should you be saying crap like ‘this will be the last time we meet’? Idiot…” I lightly flicked his forehead. It might be a little painful for him since he shut his eyes tight when I did it, but even so, there was still bewilderment lingering in the way he looked at me. Well, if he was actually this dense despite his bold confession, I suppose I had no other way.

“Kise, come here,” with my hand showing a gesture of calling him, I pulled back and settled down on the chair. He furrowed his eyebrows, but even with confusion in his eyes, he shifted towards me.

“Nope. A little closer.”

“What is it, Aomine—?!”

And just like that, I grabbed the back of his head and brought our lips together. Kise went rigid immediately, even after we had parted from each other. On the contrary, though… I couldn’t help a smirk from breaking out at the sight of his obvious astonishment.

“That’s how it is,” I touched my forehead to his, “Are you still thinking of not seeing me again ever?”

There wasn’t a single word coming out from his mouth, but the next second he buried his face on my shoulder; his fingers clutching tight to my clothes. Ah, ah… He’s gonna cry again, this crybaby…

 

_I’ll keep this a secret from you for the time being, Kise. But do you know that I want to be a cop?_

 

I rested my chin on the yellow strands clinging on my chest. Truthfully, I was glad when he said he was going to an aviation school. But even though he stopped being a model, there would still be dangers roaming around him as long as he still had that annoyingly pretty face of him. That’s why I had to become stronger, strong enough to protect him from all those people craving for him.

 

_You’d probably never imagine this, but… Kise, I strengthen myself because of you. Not that I’m ever going to tell you, though…_


	2. Memories of You

  __  


_Cover Art by[Erda Enos](http://erdaenos.tumblr.com/)_

_Dear Kagami-kun,_

_It’s been awhile. How are you? College will be starting soon, so I think I’m going to get a little busier from now on. Still, I’m looking forward to it. Please wish me luck._

_By the way, what about Kagami-kun? Are you going to college, as well? Or are you going straight to work? I’ve never been to America before, so I don’t have any idea what it is like over there. Nevertheless, I hope you are doing well._

_Speaking of which, has your father gotten better? It must be shocking to receive news about him falling ill all of a sudden, but I’m sure you can manage. Please send my best regards to your family._

 

_Yours truly,_

_Kuroko Tetsuya_

***

_Dear Kagami-kun,_

_It’s been a year. I’ve gotten used to college life now. It was pretty hard at first, but thankfully I could manage. The library was comfortable and has a larger collection of books compared to Seirin, so I find myself frequenting the place almost every day._

_Oh, did you hear about Kise-kun? Apparently, he resigned from his modeling works and went to an aviation school. He said he’s going to be a pilot. It’s kind of surprising, huh? Aomine-kun also joined the police force. I have no idea what’s gotten into him all of a sudden, but I think he is going to be fine._

_Does Kagami-kun also have a dream job? You told me once that firemen are cool. Are you going to join the fire brigade? I think Kagami-kun will also look cool in a fireman uniform, but whatever your choice will be, I wish you the best of luck. Please continue to do your best, Kagami-kun._

 

_Yours truly,_

_Kuroko Tetsuya_

_***_

_Dear Kagami-kun,_

_Four years have passed since I started college. I am going to graduate soon. Hopefully there will be no problems until then._

_I haven’t told anyone about this, but I’ve actually been planning to become a kindergarten teacher. There were a lot of things to consider before, but I realized that I like children a lot. That’s why I want to do this no matter what._

_By the way, Kagami-kun… Do you still play basketball? Once in awhile, I meet up with Kise-kun and the others to have a little game. It seems that my skills have gotten a bit rusty now, probably because I do not play in matches anymore after high school._

_But Kagami-kun is different. Actually, I once thought that you might be scouted by one of the basketball clubs over there and started playing in NBA, which makes you extremely busy. Every day, I check the international sports news, but I can’t find your name anywhere. You do not stop playing basketball, do you? Since Kagami-kun is a basketball idiot, I can’t imagine you living without playing basketball at all._

_When you return to Japan, let’s play basketball with everyone again. I bet it will be really fun._

 

_Yours truly,_

_Kuroko Tetsuya_

***

_Dear Kagami-kun,_

_It’s been six years. I’ve been working in this small kindergarten for awhile and to be honest, I’m beginning to love my job even more. The children are adorable and my colleagues are also nice. I hope you can visit us someday. We will surely welcome you._

_I’ve also been living on my own starting from last year. It was hard at first, but I could finally pull it off. It was amazing that Kagami-kun could live on your own when you were still in high school back then. Oh, and… I know this will sound silly, but I mistakenly bought a double bed when I first moved in to my current apartment. Even though it has been a long time, I seem to have forgotten that you aren’t here. But on the brighter side, that means you don’t have to worry about a place to stay when you come back to Japan._

_That reminds me… When I visited Maji Burger last week, I almost ordered 20 burgers in addition to my usual portion. Actually, this has happened several more times in the past, even more so when you had just left for the states. It really is hard to get rid of an old habit, huh? When we were still in high school, it was almost like a routine to order that many burgers since you always ate a lot._

_By the way, I need to go to sleep now. I have to get up early tomorrow, too. Let’s talk again some other time._

 

_Yours truly,_

_Kuroko Tetsuya_

***

_Dear Kagami-kun,_

_They’re tearing down the basketball court we used to visit back in high school. It seems that they are going to build a new apartment around there. The memories of our time together in that place are finally going to be erased just like that._

_I visited your old apartment again today. I don’t know why, but I just suddenly got this urge to see that place. After all, we spent a lot of time together there. Did you know? It appears that the entire building has been renovated recently. It looks a lot more modern, nothing like the place we both know from seven years ago._

_Kagami-kun, how are you doing now? I haven’t heard anything from you after all these years. Are you doing well? Have you finally been able to get your dream job? Is everything alright?_

_You know… Even though I’ve been writing these letters, to be honest I have no idea where to send them. I just thought I would try to talk to you. Times and again, I’ve tried to stop, but I couldn’t. Before I know it, I’ve been sitting on my desk, writing more and more of these unsent letters, hoping that they might reach you, even though it’s impossible._

_Kagami-kun, where are you now? Have you forgotten about me? Am I the only one who keeps wishing that we could meet again someday?_

_Kagami-kun, I miss you. I want to see you. Are we really never going to see each other again? Are things really never going to go back to how they used to be anymore? I have even forgotten how it feels to bump our fists together. I have even forgotten how it feels to cuddle together in our sleep._

_Kagami-kun…_

_How much longer should I wait for your return?_

* * *

 

How far could a person’s existence fill one’s heart? Perhaps I had never had someone so dear to me. Perhaps I had been too conscious of his presence. Despite his small figure, his existence had taken too large of a space inside me that I could never think of anyone else while he was not with me.

 

_Ah, I’m getting butterflies again…_

 

“Kuroko-sensei!”

I could hear children’s voices calling out to him. Indeed, I had heard that he became a kindergarten’s teacher after graduating from university. I was glad I did find the right place where he worked, but it still did put my heart at ease.

“Hey, who are you?!”

I was stopped in my tracks by several…dwarves. No, they were kids. Kids. Their clothes were dirty from playing in the yard and if it wasn’t ugly enough, the look they gave to me were so hostile, I thought they were gonna shove those plastic toys to my face. Before I knew it, more of them had gathered in the front gate where I was standing and even though I hated to admit it, these kids could be kind of intimidating.

“This uncle looks suspicious. He must be up to no good,” one of them said. Man, did I really look that old? I didn’t think I changed that much these past few years, though.

“Uhh… Could I meet with Kuroko-sensei…please?” I lowered myself a bit to at least match their height. It felt weird to speak so formally with children, but I couldn’t just barge in either. If even one of them screamed, I’d be so dead.

“Why do you wanna meet Kuroko-sensei? You a friend of his?” another one asked.

“Well… Kind of…”

I was thinking of telling the truth, but I decided to do otherwise and go along with them. It wouldn’t be good to plant any sort of weird thoughts into their heads when they were still this young. Fortunately, though, their hostility seemed to be decreasing after I admitted to be a friend of their teacher.

“What should we do? Should we let him in?”

“He did say he’s a friend of Sensei.”

“Hmm, well then…” one of the kids, the biggest among the others, finally turned at me and rudely pointed at my face, “You wait here, Uncle. We’re gonna go call Kuroko-sensei.”

“And don’t you dare take another step in!” the one beside him, probably the sidekick, also did the same, “If you come any closer, our squad will annihilate you where you stand, you giant old man!”

“Yeah, yeah. I swear I won’t move an inch,” I raised my right hand with a big sigh, “Thanks a bunch.”

They ran back into the school ground. Man, kids these days sure were scary. I didn’t think I looked like that when I was their age. And I still didn’t know what part of me made me looked like an old man.

 

_But at least I get to meet him._

 

My thought ran back to that night seven years ago. To be honest, I had been planning to tell him about me returning to America for awhile, but I just couldn’t find the right moment to say it. In the end, I didn’t think I chose the right moment either when I finally decided to confess. At that time, Kuroko went silent. Even though his expression did not change, it was the first time I saw him unable make any comeback.

 

_“…Why?”_

 

…was the only word he said. Truthfully, I didn’t really want him to know about my personal problem, but it wouldn’t be fair if I didn’t tell him on top of confessing at the very last minute.

 

_“I see. It can’t be helped then.”_

 

Just like that, he lied back down next to me as though nothing happened. He slept so quietly that at first I thought it really wasn’t that big of a deal to him. However, it was at that night that for the first time I witnessed something even he was probably unaware of. It was the first time…I saw Kuroko crying in his sleep.

“Kagami…kun…”

A plain, toneless voice I knew much too well brought me back to reality. Ah, he was finally here… Even after all these years, he hadn’t changed much. His small figure, his pale complexion, his silky light blue hair… The only thing that changed was that usually expressionless face of his was finally showing some expression right now.

“Is he really a friend of you, Sensei? If he’s lying we’ll kick him away this instant!”

The kids began to look at the both of us back and forth. He gazed down at those kids surrounding him and flashed a kind, loving smile.

“Yes, it’s alright. He is a friend of mine,” he said calmly, “Would you please go play elsewhere? Sensei needs to have a little conversation with him.”

Unlike with me, the kids listened to him and quickly left without forgetting to throw me a one more vicious glare. Well, at least it meant that he was loved by his students.

The both of us stood there, facing each other. A heavy silence hung upon us, and I must admit that even though I came all the way here, I did not know where to start. But…I suppose the first thing I had to do…was to apologize to him, after all.

“…I’m sorry…” I told him straight out, “You may not believe me, but it wasn’t that I didn’t contact you on purpose. I was unable to.”

“Why were you unable to?” despite his composed attitude, the look on his eyes clearly showed that he demanded a more, precise answer.

“I know this is gonna sound stupid, but…” I scratched the back of my head. Truthfully, I felt more embarrassed rather than guilty, simply because it was going to sound really stupid. “I…lost my phone. A few days after I got there, I dropped it somewhere and I couldn’t find it. All of the contact lists, including yours, were gone along with it.”

“Bakagami…”

“Tch, shut up, you…”

Seriously, it was really embarrassing to admit how such a stupid mistake could make us lost contact for the entire seven years. However, it was before long that silence returned to hang heavily upon us. Once again, I scratched the back of my head for no reason and threw a glance at him, but it was at that time I noticed he was holding his arm with his other hand. And that very hand, although faint, was obviously shaking.

“Kuroko—”

“How long?” he cut me before I could finish my line, “How long…are you going to stay here?”

“Huh? About a couple of weeks? I only came to take care of an unfinished business.”

“…I see…”

He said no other words. Even as we spoke, he did not look at me in the eyes once. It was as though he wanted to leave as soon as possible, as though he was trying to put up an impression that he did not want to talk to me.

“Ahh, geez! Didn’t you hear a word I said?” I let out a big sigh, “I told you I’m coming back to take care of an unfinished _business_. Should I really spell everything out for you?!”       

His attitude seriously got to my nerves. Impatiently, I decided to grab his hand and pulled him closer.

“I’m telling you I want to take you with me, dammit!”

I looked straight at his face. Those light blue spheres were now staring at me in the weirdest way that I thought I had slipped somewhere. I said it right, right? Did my face turn red or anything? I mean, now he should get it, shouldn’t he? I kept wondering and wondering restlessly until all of a sudden, a sudden blow smashed me hard in the stomach that I stepped backward, falling on my knees while coughing hard.

“That hurts! What the hell, Kuroko?!” I protested at the culprit who stood straight before me, “Ignite Pass isn’t supposed to be used on people!”

“Because Kagami-kun deserved it,” he replied without moving an inch. I couldn’t get a good look at his face, so I couldn’t figure out what he was thinking as he continued. “You left all of a sudden and returned all of a sudden. And now you’re telling me to come with you without any prior notice? What am I supposed to say to my employer?”

“Huh? How should I—”

“It’s unfair,” he cut my line again, “It’s unfair. You’re so unfair, Kagami-kun.”

Those words stopped me in my tracks. Now I could see clearly how that small figure of his was shaking, struggling to stop himself from bursting out. The moment I saw it, I immediately forgot about the pain in my stomach. I just…really wanted to hold him right now.

“I’m sorry,” I walked towards him as I stood up, putting a hand on his hair and slowly ruffled the light blue strands, “I was the one at fault, I know. But, Kuroko… Will you forgive me? Will you come with me?”

There was not a word coming out from his mouth, but the small nod he gave was more than enough of an answer that I needed. I was relieved, honestly. As I let out another sigh, it felt as though all the burdens I had been carrying these past seven years of constantly thinking about him were blown out of the window.

 

_“How long is it going to last this time?”_

 

I was rather startled when I heard the small whisper. I gazed down at him, but saw nothing than his hand tugging at the tip of my clothes as he remained standing there, close to me. Really, this guy… I just couldn’t help a grin from breaking out as I ruffled his hair harder.

 

_“Are you stupid? Of course, for as long as you want.”_


	3. Fate

_Man proposes, God disposes_. To do everything in one’s power, so that one would be worthy of fate’s grace; this was what I had always believed. I always followed my fate. I always did everything I could. Yes. It was quite simple. Fate would never abandon those who were willing to do the best effort they could manage. And I, for one, was not one of those laid-back people who merely waited for help to come. Therefore, I had never lost sight of the future. If I did everything in my power, certainly fate would bestow me its blessings.

 

_Which is why I wonder… This is the first time in my life I do not know which path to take._

 

I had asked myself, thinking of where I had made a mistake or when I had probably did something unworthy of fate’s grace. I thought long and hard, but came up with no answer while the time limit was drawing close. This guy standing in front of me… What must I say to him?

“Shin-chan… Let’s do it… Okay?”

He asked a question, but did not wait for an answer. Without a pause, he pushed me back to the headboard and climbed onto the bed. One of his legs slipped and he had to climb back up, but even so he continued straddling on top of me who could only remained silent at his relentless actions.

“You don’t have…to do anything. I’ll take care of it, because I’m the one who make you do this with me…”

He spoke with his usual smile plastered all over his face, but the tone of his voice was never as bright as it used to be. His fingers trailed over my clothes, attempting to take the buttons off. Yet to locate where the buttons were was already quite a struggle for him. He said not even a word and continued, but my eyes caught the faint sight of him gritting his teeth in frustration.

“…I’ll do it,” I said, pulling his hands away from their fruitless effort to take off even a single button, “Sit still. I will take care of us both.”

“Yeah… Sorry…” he replied with a smile, now bitter and dejected. I could hear he let out a desperate sigh, but even so he resigned himself to me. “I’ll be in your care then.”

Takao had lost his sight. It started somewhere after the Winter Cup during our third year, the last Winter Cup we played together as a team. We had resigned from the basketball club to concentrate on our studies, but even so, nothing had really changed between the two of us. However, one day Takao just suddenly doubled over on the floor during class. He curled up like a ball; his entire body tensing up. He was nearly tearing at both of his eyes. They burnt, he said, and knowing next to nothing about what was happening, all we could do was to admit him to a hospital immediately.

 

_“No worries. I’m just going to have pretty bad eyesight from today onwards.”_

 

I remembered his face and voice as he said it on the next day. It was as though there really wasn’t anything serious at all, and I, too, did not spare another thought of it, just like everybody else in class. Now that I think about it, perhaps that was the one mistake I had ever made.

“S-Shin…chan… Ah, I… I want to see you… I can’t…see you…”

If only I had paid more attention, if only I had asked him what was actually happening… Takao endured everything all by himself by covering his troubles with his usual frivolous demeanor. Even though he began to wear glasses, switching to contact lenses once in awhile, never once did he show any sign of grief. Today was the first time I had ever heard about how serious it actually was, when he asked me to come over to his house after school, just to tell me that he was going to stop coming to school altogether.

“Where…are you? Shin-chan… Where are you? Where…?”

Wasn’t it supposed to be blissful when you were connected with your loved one? Wasn’t it supposed to fill our hearts with joy when our fingers entwined? Yet none of those feelings ever came to us. We kissed, we held hands, we embraced each other. Nevertheless, a pricking pain was all I felt at the end of it all, as tears fell dripping down on my shoulder from his now sightless eyes.

“Shin-chan… Thank you…” he whispered with both arms wrapped around my neck, “You’re leaving Japan soon, right? I’m sorry to make you do this, even though we’re both guys.”

This was it. This was the time limit. I must quickly decide and tell him now. But which path should I take? For some reason, I knew I would live the rest of my life regretting it if I made the wrong choice.

“It’s okay, Shin-chan. You should go. Can’t waste the scholarship you get from studying so hard all these years, right?” he said before I could turn my thoughts into words, “Hmm? What? Are you wondering how I could find out about what you’ve been thinking?”

He chuckled to his own words, as though they were something incredibly amusing.

“Of course I’d know. Who do you think spend each day watching our Ace-sama and all his antiques?” a wide smile drew itself on his lips. Usually, I would not bat an eye to his jokes, but right now I could not help but noticed the contradictions he’d made for himself. His voice was laughing and his lips curled a smile, but his hands were gripping tight onto me as though trying to tie me down. It was before long that he hung his head down and said. “But… I do have one request, though… Will you hear me out?”

“…What is it?”

“Don’t forget about me…please…” he spoke again, now with a nearly tearful voice as he struggled to keep up his smile, “With your abilities, I’m sure you’ll have no problem over there. Somehow I just know that you will be successful. But… Please don’t forget about me. Whenever you’re free, please send me an e-mail or two. Even if I’ve become like this, I can still get someone’s help to read it for me and send a reply to you.”

He buried his face on my shoulder.

“Even if… Even if you’ve met and fallen in love with someone else, I wouldn’t mind as long as you’re happy. We could go back to just being friends as usual, it’s okay. Just…  Don’t forget about me…please…”

Silent fell upon the both of us. It was at that time I realized that I had strayed from the way I had been living. Up until this point, I had always been trying to do everything in my power, so I would be granted with the fruit of my labor. However, unconsciously I turned myself from my own belief. I thought his existence next to me was something as normal as air. I took him and all of the things he’d done for granted. Instead of doing everything I could, I remained idle and waited to receive from him. Yes… That must be why fate decided to punish me by giving me this trial.

“Say, Shin-chan… Would you take your glasses off?” he asked me as I was nearly lost in my own thought. His hands were desperately trying to get a hold of the pair of spectacles in front of my eyes, though his effort was once again in vain.

“Why should I take it off?” I returned his question, even though I complied to his words anyway. Knowing that I had taken it off, he gently moved his fingers to my face. Brows, eyes, nose, mouth… He slowly trailed almost every single inch of my face before drawing a smile, with his eyes red from all the tears he had shed mere moments ago.

“I want to remember your face. The shape, the feeling of your skin, everything… If I’m never going to see you again, might as well carve everything into my mind right here and now so I won’t forget,” he chuckled once again before throwing himself onto me, wrapping his arms around my neck tightly as he rested his face on my shoulder and whispered.

 

 _“I love you, Shin-chan. Please be happy over there and keep doing your best. My beloved Ace-sama… I will never forget about you.”_

 

* * *

_Man proposes, God disposes_. To do everything in one’s power, so that one would be worthy of fate’s grace; this was what he always believed. He always followed his fate. He always did everything he could. To me and everyone, it looked so weird and complicated, even to the point of irritating. I thought it was something I could never understand. However, as I stayed by his side, I began to notice that despite what others thought of him, he kept striving on the road he had chosen for himself. On and on, without losing sight of his goal, even though time and again he had to push himself to the limit, he kept on putting the best effort he could manage. When I saw him doing this, no matter how strange he might be, it was simply impossible for me to hate him.

 

_Though it’s not like I can see him ever again…_

 

Once in awhile, I asked myself what he might be doing over there. He did send me e-mails every now and then, just as I requested, and my sister usually helped me reading and replying to them. Truthfully, it was quite amusing how it almost sounded as if he was writing a daily report, but I was still happy nonetheless. He remembered… He did not forget about me.

“Takao-san, how are you feeling right now?”

The doctor asked me as soon as he entered my room. I could not see what face he was making, so I would not know if he really asked out of concern or simply because he had to do his job. Either way, it did not make much difference to me.

“I’m good,” I put up a smile as I inclined my face towards the direction of his voice, “Nothing out of the sort. I’m feeling pretty normal.”

Ah, that’s right… After ten long years, I finally gathered up the courage to do an operation. Though, it wasn’t like I had a lot of hope for this to return my eyes back to normal. In the first place, I didn’t even know why I would lose my previously perfect sight all of a sudden. They said it was due to some kind of damage to my nerves that directly affected the eyes, but even so they did not know what the actual problem that caused it. Therefore, there weren’t any guarantees that this operation would end up in a success. As for the reason why I still did it despite the unknown result, I simply imagined that if he were here, he would certainly tell me this:

 

_“Didn’t anyone teach you to do the likeliest and God will do the best? Definitive effort makes you worthy of fates grace.”_

 

…or so he would say. Man, I could even imagine that smug on his face as he preached those words over and over again. But true to his words, I had never seen him failed to fulfill his own belief, although at that time, for some reason I had the feeling that he was faltering. Perhaps it was because I had stayed for so long by his side that I began to understand what he was thinking before he even had to speak. At that moment, he was probably considering to stay with me out of responsibility. I knew…because he was surprised when I told him my eyesight had gotten so bad, I had to quit school.

“I’ll take off the bandage. Please tell me if you feel anything strange,” said the doctor again. I could hear his footsteps approaching the bed I was lying on, so I slowly brought myself up as he stood right beside me.

“Yeah. Got it.”

I gave him a small nod and he skillfully began to unwrap the bandage around my eyes little by little. Ah, that reminds me… That guy used to tape his left fingers all the time, too, that he became so good at wrapping and unwrapping it. I wonder if he was still doing that… I mean, in the first place, it was for the sake of his shooting accuracy, right? If he didn’t play basketball anymore, he wouldn’t need to that anymore, would he?

 

_Maybe I’d better ask him that in the next e-mail…_

 

And while I was at it, I’d tease him a bit if he already had someone he liked over there. Might be funny to see him with some blond chick by his side. Actually, it didn’t suit him at all. That stoic guy couldn’t even talk properly with the girls in our class back then.

…Haha… What was I thinking? Imagining the one I loved with someone else and even made a joke about it… I must be crazy. Well, in the first place I must’ve been crazy back then, too. Saying crap like it would be okay if he fell in love with someone else… Saying that we could go back to just being friends as usual, while in reality I was devastated when he left.

 

_Ha! Who’s the hypocrite now?_

 

Despite his nasty choice of words and weird obsessions, Midorima was earnest. He never lied. He did what he said he would do. Meanwhile, to put up a strong face, I told him it would be okay as long as he was happy. If I really was as earnest as him, I wouldn’t ask him not to forget about me. In a sense, I was pushing my selfish request to him while completely ignoring his feelings.

 

_I’m sorry, Shin-chan… I hope one day, you can forgive me…_

 

“It’s done,” the doctor’s words startled me as he took off the last piece of bandage from my eyes, “Now… Please try to open your eyes, Takao-san.”

It was a rather foreign feeling to open my eyelids after they had been closed and wrapped for a long time after the operation. However, I did as told and slowly opened my eyes.

“Tell me… What do you see?” he asked.

“…I see…colors…”

For a brief moment, I was stunned. It couldn’t be…could it? I mean… I took this operation on a whim, so for this to actually turn out to be a success was just too good to be true.

“That’s good,” replied the doctor. I could see his figure standing in front of me, covered in white as he gave the next instructions. “Now try to blink several times and see if you’d gain a better focus.”

Once… Twice… Thrice… I blinked my eyes several times, slowly at first, then a little faster afterwards. It was true… My sight really was regaining a better focus gradually.

“Does it feel better now?” the doctor asked.

“Y-Yeah! I mean… Yeah, I could see much better from before,” I said in the middle of my astonishment as I shifted my gaze around the room. I didn’t want to exaggerate things, but to be able to see again after such a long time left me in such awe I didn’t know what else to say.

“That’s good,” the doctor said once again. Unexpectedly to me, his fingers, wrapped in white taping, tilted my chin to his direction as his green eyes, hidden behind a pair of spectacles looked straight into mine.

 

_“Now look over here and tell me… Do you remember my face…Takao?”_


	4. Last Nights

_“I want to be there for you when you’re lonely. I want to hug you when you’re sad. So… Can I stay by your side?”_

_“…I am very happy to hear you feel that way about me, Atsushi. However, I’m afraid I am not the right person to accept your feelings.”_

_“.................”_

_“Don’t be sad. One day, you will meet someone who can accept and return your feelings the way you want it. I know you will…Atsushi…”_

* * *

I snuck into Muro-chin’s room tonight.

It wasn’t that he forgot to lock the door. It was just I often came over uninvited that eventually, he decided not to lock the door so I could just come in and out any time I wanted without making him going back and forth to open the door for me. It was just like how I always put all my snacks right next to my desk, so I could just pick one whenever I felt like it. Looking back about it, this had lasted for the entire two years since we’d become acquainted to each other.

Ah, yeah, that’s right… So I had known Muro-chin for two years. To think that he wouldn’t be here anymore soon…

I stood there silently, staring at his sleeping figure in the dark room. There was nothing I could say since he was already fast asleep, so I simply left it on his desk and just as silently, I left the room.

It was two weeks before the third years’ graduation.

 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

 

Muro-chin seemed confused today.

When we were eating lunch together in the cafeteria, he told me that something strange had been happening in the last few days. He didn’t look scared or anything, but he did seem concerned about it.

“What do you think, Atsushi?” he asked me. And to his question, I told him that if it wasn’t something dangerous or scary, then it would be okay. Muro-chin laughed at my answer. He said it was so like me, but he decided to follow my suggestions for now.

I wonder… Despite all those talks, overall Muro-chin still looked very normal, as if it was just another day for him. Didn’t he feel anything at all? Seeing him looking as calm as always kind of pissed me off more than having someone stole my snacks, but I wouldn’t tell him.

 

_I’ll just sneak into his room again tonight._

 

With that thought in my mind, I followed him as we left the cafeteria. It was ten days before the third years’ graduation.

 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

 

…Muro-chin’s room looked different.

Usually there would be his stuffs on the shelves and desk, but now, almost everything had been packed into the boxes. Even in this darkness, I knew this wasn’t the same room I frequented to visit. Just like seeing the convenience store I frequented to visit being closed down, soon everything I was familiar with would be gone. And then someone else would occupy this place, and it would never be Muro-chin’s room ever again.

I felt angry for some reason. The thought of someone else aside of Muro-chin being here almost felt like being told that my favorite snack would never be on sale again, and that I had to manage with other snacks I didn’t like. Couldn’t Muro-chin just not graduate and stay? Why did he have to always get good grades in almost every subject? I wished he would fail in a couple of tests and stayed here for another year.

 

_Muro-chin, why can’t you stay here?_

 

I remained standing there for another minute before I finally walked out of the door, leaving it on his desk as usual.

It was a week before the third years’ graduation.

 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

 

“Atsushi, is there something on your mind?”

He blurted out that question without any prior notice. We were having lunch in the cafeteria as usual and to be honest, I was almost caught off guard as though I was tasting strawberry from the supposedly chocolate milkshake. But I wouldn’t show it to him. Nope, no way.

“Hmm? Why did you ask, Muro-chin?” I returned his question.

“You seem rather quiet lately. Are you okay?”

“…I’m okay…”

I didn’t want him to pursue this matter any further. Truthfully, I was still angry at him for not showing even a bit of change. Was it not enough? Was it insufficient to tell him what I felt? What else did I have to do to make him understand?

“Atsushi?”

“I’m okay,” I told him again since he didn’t stop staring at me. All of a sudden, I had this urge to ask him. Maybe he’d get it if I asked. “Muro-chin, you’re moving to Tokyo?”

“Well, yes. The university I’ve enrolled to is there after all,” he replied nonchalantly in his usual manner. So he still didn’t understand after all. Muro-chin was so very stupid although he was usually smart.

“You’d be leaving the day after graduation?”

“Yes. I couldn’t stay in the dormitory anymore because I’m literally not a student of Yosen after graduating, right?” he laughed casually, “Besides, I’ve found a good place to stay in Tokyo. It’s close to the university and the rent isn’t really expensive.”

“…I see…”

 

_Why don’t you get it already, Muro-chin?_

 

Even though I had been doing that every day, it seemed that my effort was for naught. It was three days before the third years’ graduation.

 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

 

I sat down on the floor, crossing my legs. In front of me was Muro-chin, fast asleep on his bed. By now, his room was almost empty. What remained were several small stuffs he could carry by himself.

 

_Muro-chin, are you really leaving?_

 

I buried my face on top of his mattress. I wanted him to stay. I wanted him to always be here. I didn’t want this room to belong to someone else. This bed… I didn’t want to see someone else aside of Muro-chin sleeping on it.

“Muro-chin…”

I turned my face and looked at him. He was still sleeping without giving sign of waking up. Even when I touched his hair, he didn’t give as much as a meaningless mumble and changed his position a little.

“Muro-chin, can’t you stay here?”

The more I stared into his face, the more painful it felt for me. I hated this… It was painful and troublesome, but I couldn’t get rid of it. It was…the same at that time. If I were a type of snack sold in the store, it would be the feeling of having a regular customer who always bought me suddenly stopped coming altogether and I could only remain in the shelf, wondering if I could ever see him again. Even though I had found someone like him once more… Must I deal with this all over again?

“Muro-chin, please don’t go…”

And just like that, I lied next to him and hugged him tightly. If only by doing this I could make him stay… I didn’t want to let go. I didn’t want to be away from him. I wanted Muro-chin…to be here…with me…

“…At…sushi…?”

My eyes went wide. What…was I doing? I came in and out quietly on purpose all these days, and now I went ahead and just woke him up?

“Atsushi… Is that you?” his eyes immediately met mine, “Why are you here? And…what are you doing?”

It was the night before the third years’ graduation.

 

* * *

 

“…And thus, from the bottom of my heart, I would like to congratulate all of the graduates. May you find success in the future.”

The headmaster’s speech ended the graduation ceremony. There were cheers of joy; everyone was smiling and laughing as they congratulated each other. However, in the midst of all that, compared to the overwhelming atmosphere of happiness, I was more drawn to those who cried for being separated from their friends.

 

_Atsushi…_

 

My mind flew back to what happened last night. Indeed, I had never locked my room because Atsushi often came over to my place, but during the two years I had been friends with him, it never crossed my mind even once that he would do such a thing.

 

_“Why are you here? And…what are you doing?”_

_“..................”_

_“Atsushi?”_

_“…Muro-chin… I want to be with you…”_

_“What?”_

_“…Nothing… Sorry for the intrusion…”_

And just like that, he dashed out of my room before I could even say another word. I was very surprised to find him next to me, and more than that, to find myself in his arms all of a sudden. Perhaps that was why I could not react fast enough to stop him.

 

_Atsushi… What was he thinking?_

 

He didn’t come to today’s ceremony, even though the underclassmen were all present. I’d really like to think that he was probably just lazy as usual, but now that he’d gone and done that, I couldn’t dismiss the thought that this was most probably related to last night. Perhaps I had to visit his room and ask him directly. After all, I didn’t get the chance to ask him anything since he literally flew out of my room so quickly back there.

 

_Though… I wonder what kind of face I should make when I see him…_

 

A sweet smell immediately entered my nose as I returned to the dormitory. That was weird… Could it be that someone was using the kitchen? But this smell… I had never known that someone was capable of making sweets in the boys’ dormitory. And to my surprise, the one who stood in the middle of the kitchen, now in complete disarray, was a guy I knew much too well.

“Atsushi?”

“M-Muro-chin?!”

He was taken off guard, no doubt about it. It was written clearly all over his face that was dirty with stains of flour. With his purple hair tied to the back of his head, his clothes were almost entirely covered in flour and other sorts of ingredients, even though he was wearing an apron. If it wasn’t enough, the entire kitchen was more or less in the same condition. But more than that, I was more curious about what he was doing here all alone while everyone else was in the auditorium.

“Atsushi, what on earth are you doing?” I stood there in amazement. It was before long that I noticed a large bowl and a whisk on his hands. “You’re…making a cake…?”

“…Yeah…”

The giant in front of me hung his head down like a dejected puppy. He didn’t even look at me in the eyes like he usually did. But all the more, it only spurred my curiosity.

“Why are you making a cake?” I asked him.

“…apologize…to Muro-chin…”

His voice sounded more like mumbles than an answer, but I could make out a few words and it confused me even more.

“You want to apologize? To me?”

He gave a small nod. Now that I think about it, I couldn’t really see his face well because it was dark in my room last night, but when I asked him what he was doing, I thought Atsushi looked almost as dejected as he was right now.

“…I want to apologize to Muro-chin,” he spoke again with his head down, staring at that bowl and whisk in his hand, “I’m sorry…for doing that…”

“Atsushi…” this giant of a guy looked sort of pitiful that I couldn’t even begin to ask him anything. So my suspicion was true, after all. “I knew it. It was you, wasn’t it? The one who left cakes on my desk every day… It was you, right, Atsushi?”

He didn’t answer, but his silence was enough of a confirmation for me. For some reason, all his words and actions in the last few days came back to me. He was most likely trying to tell me something, but in the end, he didn’t say a word.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” I took a step closer. I thought he flinched just a little upon noticing that I was getting closer, but still he stayed where he was. “Atsushi, you have something to tell me, don’t you? What is it?”

He bit his lips and shifted his gaze.

“Atsushi.”

Still, he refused to answer.

“Hey, Atsushi…” I put both hands of his face and made him looked at me, “Tell me… What is it that you’re thinking?”

There was a brief moment of silent, but then he told me something unexpected, even in my wildest dreams.

 

_“I want to be there for you when you’re lonely. I want to hug you when you’re sad. So… Can I stay by your side?”_

 

I must’ve looked like an idiot with my mouth wide opened. I couldn’t even begin to think how I should respond to that, but as he stared into my face, studying my reaction, Atsushi seemed more dejected than ever.

“…I guess not, huh?” he hung his head, “I told Aka-chin this two years ago, but he said he wasn’t the right person to accept it.”

“Aka-chin is… Ah, you mean you’ve told this to Akashi before?”

“Mm-hm. He said one day, I would meet someone who could accept and return my feelings, but I suppose for the first time, Aka-chin is wrong.”

For a few seconds, I was rather dumbfounded by his sudden confession, but it was before long that I found myself struggling to hold back my laughter. This…twisted, childish way of confessing… He could just tell me if he liked me and he would be lonely once I had graduated, but instead of telling me directly, he did all that while being completely absorbed in his own thoughts.

“But…why the cakes, Atsushi?” I asked him, trying my best not to let him know I that nearly died from suppressing this laugh.

“I thought if you like the cakes and become curious about it, you wouldn’t leave,” replied him bluntly, “And…those were my favorite tastes. I thought if I gave you all my favorite tastes of cakes, Muro-chin would understand that if you were a cake, you would be my absolute favorite.”

I thought there would never be a human being who was capable of saying those things except kids, but I supposed I had found one of those innocent kids right here in front of me.

“Oh, dear… What am I supposed to do with you?” I let out a sigh. To be honest, I could not stop a smile from breaking out as I took that bowl and whisk away from his hands, leaving them on the table before I wiped the stains of flour on his face. “Thank you for the cakes, Atsushi. They were delicious. You might want to consider being a P _â_ tissier or something like that once you graduated.”

“Really? So you like them, Muro-chin?” just like a child, he quickly brightened up even with that simple praise.

“Of course,” I nodded, “But, you know… Now I am no longer a student of Yosen. I have graduated and I have to go to university. So it is impossible for me to stay here.”

I knew he would make that pitifully sad face again, so I quickly continued.

“But Atsushi… I still want to taste more of your cakes. If you don’t mind, we can meet up every now and then, so make sure to bring me some, alright?”

“I can still…meet with Muro-chin?”

“Didn’t you say you’re going to be with me when I’m lonely or sad?” I let out a chuckle, “Well, I might get a little lonely in Tokyo, so… Will you come and comfort me then?”

I thought I could see a streak of red on his cheeks, but without saying anything, that giant guy with the heart of a little kid quickly nodded. At his reaction, I couldn’t help but laugh as I pulled his face to my shoulder with my arms around his neck.

 

_My dear Atsushi… How can I ever leave you alone?_


	5. The Future I See

_Briiing! Briiing! Briiing!_

 

“Hello?”

_“Kouki.”_

“Yes, this is Furihata Kouki speaking. Who is this?”

_Ah, it appears that you have forgotten my voice, even though we met every day.”_

“W— AAHH!! A-A-A-Akashi?! I-I’m sorry! I’m so sorry!!!”

_“…You’re loud, Kouki. In any case, there is no need to freak out, and how many times have I told that it’s okay to call me by name?”_

“Uhh, I… I’m sorry… Sei…”

_“That sounds better.”_

“But where did you get my number?”

_“I met Tetsuya the other day, so I thought I’d ask him for it.”_

“Tetsuya is… Ah, oh, I… I see… From Kuroko, huh?”

_“Yes. By the way, do you have a minute, Kouki?”_

“Hmm? Yeah, I’m free right now. What’s up?”

_“Tomorrow’s morning lecture… Would you mind if I copy your notes later? I will be unable to attend, you see.”_

“Sure, I don’t mind. But it’s unusual for you to absent. Is something wrong?”

_“No, not really. I will be there for the afternoon lecture. I am simply unable to attend the first one in the morning.”_

“I see… Okay then. I’ll give it to you tomorrow.”

_“Alright. Thank you, Kouki. Good night.”_

“Yeah. Good night, Sei.”

 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

 

_Briiing! Briiing! Briiing!_

 

“Hello?”

_“Kouki.”_

“Aka— I mean, Sei? What’s up?”

_“Tomorrow’s lectures… It appears that I will have to bother you again with the notes. I apologize.”_

“N-No, it’s fine, really. But are you really okay? I mean… This is already the third time you’re not coming to campus. You’ve never done this before.”

_“Yes, it’s alright. I can assure you, everything is perfectly fine.”_

“So you’re not sick or anything?”

_“No, I’m not. Thank you for your concern, Kouki.”_

“Y-Yeah… No prob…”

_“.................”_

“Sei?”

_“Are you worried about me, Kouki?”_

“Uhh, I… I… Kind of… Yeah…”

_“Well… It’s just a matter concerning the family business. I am their only heir, after all, so it is normal if I would be needed to attend every once in awhile. There is no need for you to worry.”_

“Yeah, I see…”

_“…Say, do you have time this weekend?”_

“This weekend? Yup, I’m free. What about it?”

_“Do you want to go somewhere? My treat.”_

“H-Huh? W-Why all of a sudden…?”

_“Consider it a token of gratitude from me for always troubling you with the notes.”_

“I told you I don’t mind at all. Really.”

_“I insist.”_

“W-Well… If you say so then…”

_“Good. I’ll tell you about the meeting time and place later, alright?”_

“Okay.”

_“Well then… Good night, Kouki.”_

“Good night, Sei.”

 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

 

_Briiing! Briiing! Briiing!_

 

“Sei?”

_“Have you gotten home, Kouki?”_

“Yeah. Just finished taking a bath, actually.”

_“I see.”_

“What’s wrong?”

_“Nothing in particular. I simply want to thank you. I had fun today.”_

“Don’t mention it. I should be the one thanking you instead since you’ve practically treated me to almost everything. I kinda feel bad about it.”

_“...........”_

“Sei? You there?”

_“…If you feel bad about it, then maybe you should treat me the next time we go out somewhere.”_

“Eh? Really? It’s okay if we go out again?”

_“Why are you so surprised?”_

“N-No, I just didn’t expect to hear that from you. I mean… In the first place, I wouldn’t even be able to take you to those high class hang-out places.”

_“Then take me to places you usually visit.”_

“But they’re not even close to your level!”

_“I don’t mind. I’m thrilled to think that I will obtain new experiences from it as long as you’re coming with me.”_

“If… If you say so then… Is…next Saturday okay?”

_“I think so. Yes.”_

“Alright. It’s another date then!”

_“Another date?”_

“Ah, I-I mean… Don’t… Don’t you think the both of us…going somewhere together s-s-sounds like a date? K-Kinda…? Haha…”

_“I see… Yes, when you put it that way, it sounds like a date. Well then, I shall be looking forward to our next date.”_

“Y-Y-Yeah.”

_“Your voice is shaking. Does the idea of going on a date with me embarrass you that much?”_

“I-I’m not embarrassed! …Well, maybe a little…”

_“You’re an interesting person, really.”_

“Stop it, please. I think my face is burning.”

_“................”_

“…Did I just hear you laugh over there?”

_“I have no idea what you’re talking about.”_

“Ugh… I’ll get you for this, I swear…”

_“So you’ve finally found the courage to actually threaten me.”_

“W-What? Do you have any problem with that?”

_“No. I just remembered that you used to be so frightened even from just a mere sight of me, but now we can talk normally and equally. I’m happy.”_

“…You sure say some embarrassing things easily…”

_“Is it that embarrassing?”_

“Ahh… Forget it… I think I’m going to sleep.”

_“I see. Then, good night, Kouki. I wish you have a good dream to night.”_

“Yeah, same to you.”

 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

_Briiing! Briiing! Briiing!_

 

“Oh, Sei! I was just about to call you. You see, tomorrow… What do you think if we go to—”

_“I’m sorry, Kouki, but I think I will not be able to come tomorrow.”_

“…Eh?”

_“I’m terribly sorry.”_

“W-What’s wrong? Are you alright, Sei?”

_“Yes, I am perfectly fine. Why did you ask?”_

“You…sound a little different…I think…”

_“How am I different from usual?”_

“Your voice sounds kind of sad.”

_“...............”_

“Sei? Something’s wrong after all, right? What is it?”

_“…Do you have a minute, Kouki?”_

“Of course. One minute, ten minutes… You can talk to me for as long as you want. I’ll listen to you.”

_“What do you want to do after graduating from university?”_

“Huh? Well, I want to get a job, of course.”

_“What kind of job?”_

“Umm… Considering my abilities, I think it’s just going to be one of those regular office jobs. You know, like those salarymen and all.”

_“I see. What will you do then?”_

“What do you mean what will I do?”

_“You get a job. And then?”_

“And then…I’ll work? I’ll live my life like everybody else does.”

_“Will you have a family?”_

“A-About that… I haven’t thought that far, but… If I meet the right person, then… I guess, yeah?”

_“I see. That is quite a simple future.”_

“I’m just a simple, ordinary guy after all… Though, if you don’t mind me asking, what’s the big deal, Sei?”

_“…Do you know that I can see the entirety of the future?”_

“Well, yes. You say that all the time.”

_“I was merely wondering if your future that I saw was the same with the future you imagined.”_

“And it was pinpointed, as always, huh?”

_“I suppose, yes.”_

“What about you then?”

_“What about me?”_

 “After graduating from university, what do you want to do?”

_“Kouki… You already know that I have the family business to take care of.”_

“Sure, but… Isn’t there something, anything you want to do aside of inheriting your family business? You know, like… Have you ever imagined yourself doing your dream job and all?”

_“I…have never thought about it…”_

“W-Whoa… Like, seriously? Don’t you have anything you like? Sort of a hobby, maybe?”

_“If you put it that way… I suppose I am very fond of playing Shogi.”_

“Haha, I figured as much. Must be fun if you can actually become a professional Shogi player, huh? You might even write a legend out of yourself. Akashi Seijuurou, the Shogi Player of Miracle.”

_“................”_

“Sei? You’d better not be laughing again over there.”

_“No. I was just thinking that it does not sound too far-fetched.”_

“That’s some confidence you got there. But then again, you really have never lost.”

_“Indeed, I haven’t.”_

“Haha, I know, right?”

_“…Thank you, Kouki. It was fun talking with you.”_

“Huh? Well, sure. No problem.”

_“And tomorrow… I’m terribly sorry for canceling it one-sidedly.”_

“That’s alright. We can go next time.”

_“…Next time…huh…?”_

“Sorry? I didn’t hear that one.”

_“No, it’s nothing. Good night, Kouki.”_

“Good night, Sei. I’ll see you again in campus on Monday.”

_“…Yes. See you…”_

 

* * *

 

Whiffs of white smokes evaporated into the air each time I let out my breath. Tonight was rather cold, it seemed. And to make matters worse, I had forgotten to wear my gloves when I went out. Going back just to get it was too much of a hassle, so I decided I had to make do by putting them into the pocket of my coat.

The park was extremely quiet with not a single soul in sight. Well, it was to be expected, considering how late it had been. Even if there were people around, they were simply passersby. From the bench I was sitting on, I could see that the majority of them were those coming home from work.

 

_Salarymen, huh?_

 

That reminds me… He, too, said that he would probably choose this line of work. So that mean one day, if I sat on this bench again, I might see him amongst those passersby. Going to work early in the morning and coming home at night… That sounded like a very simple and boring life, but for some reason I felt a streak of jealousy towards that so-called boring life.

_“Umm… Considering my abilities, I think it’s just going to be one of those regular office jobs. You know, like those salarymen and all.”_

_“And then…I’ll work? I’ll live my life like everybody else does.”_

_“A-About that… I haven’t thought that far, but… If I meet the right person, then… I guess, yeah?”_

 

Such indecisive answers… But even so, I envied him for having a choice to make to determine his own life. Even though it was filled with uncertainty, it was still thrilling nonetheless. However, to be able to make a choice for my own life was probably something I would never have a taste of.

 

_I can see the entirety of the future._

 

What future, then, did I see for myself? Even without having to think, the path was already laid bare in front of me. It was a certain, definite life without even a branch on the straightforward road. Ever since I was small, I had already been aware of this fact as someone born under the name of “Akashi”.

“…Sei…?”

A voice I knew much too well. Even without having to look, I knew already who the owner of that voice was. The only question that remained in my head was how he could find out that I was here.

“Sei, it’s you, right?”

Without waiting for a respond, he quickly dashed towards the bench where I was sitting. His brown hair fluttered in the darkness with his vigorous breaths puffing more and more white smokes into the air. It was when he finally stood in front of me that I noticed his face was almost as white as papers.

“Where have you been, Sei? You didn’t come to campus for three days straight and you didn’t even answer your phone when I call. I thought something bad was happening to you!”

A flurry of questions blurted out from his lips the moment he managed to catch his racing breaths. To be honest, I could imagine he was actually having a lot more questions he wanted to ask, but he simply didn’t know where to start. It was all obviously written on his face. As always, he was easy to read.

“I ran away from home,” with a casual smile, I answered all his questions with a single sentence. However, it was to be expected that his reaction wasn’t as casual, certainly. After this, he’d probably start asking about why I did it.

“You… You ran away?” he furrowed his eyebrows, “But why? Is it… Is it because of that rumor?”

True, his answer was not far from my expectations, but now… What sort of rumor was he talking about? For some reason, I had a rather bad feeling about this.

“What rumor?” I asked him straight out. He seemed concerned, as though he was thinking of whether to answer my question or not. But eventually he told me about it.

“You know… The girls in campus…are all going frenzy about you going to be engaged to the daughter of your father’s colleagues,” he bit his lips. For the first time in my life, I had hoped that my expectation would be wrong, but as disappointing as it might be, I was still right, after all. “Is it true, Sei? Is that why you run away from home? Because you’re against the engagement?”

Was I really against it, I wonder… Ever since I was born, the path of my life as an “Akashi” had been decided. To simply change it for whatever reason would be unforgivable.

“It was sort of a business deal, if I might say,” I told him as he stood still in front of me, “The girl’s father and my father both are successful businessmen. For me to be engaged to the daughter of such a man would be very beneficial to the company.”

“Do you like the girl?” he asked. From the way he looked at me, it was obvious that his mind was filled with confusion and disagreement.

“I have met her several times now. Rather, we were told to meet by our respective parents,” I replied. A puff of white smoke evaporated from my mouth as I spoke. “She is a decent woman, a lady befitting of her family status.”

“W-Well, yeah. It’s not surprising that she’s such a refined young lady. But do you like her? Do you love her enough that you want to marry her?”

“Knowing my position, you should’ve understood that such feelings were out of a question. It is not for me to decide.”

“But that… That’s not fair, is it?” he hung his head down. Strange… If anything, I should be the one feeling dejected for being forced into a marriage all of a sudden with a stranger. “You didn’t get a chance to choose what kind of job you’d like to have in the future. And now you also didn’t get a chance to choose with whom you want to live the rest of your life with? That’s so unfair.”

Looking at his face right now, I could only wonder why he was the one who looked as if he was about to cry. I, for one, would definitely be unable to cry for another’s sake.

“The moment I was born into the family of Akashi, my life has been written for me until the moment I die,” I drew a smile as I gazed into his confused face, “I shouldn’t complain about it. I must not complain. It is the duty of an Akashi to always aim for the best and obtain victory. This engagement, for one, is definitely a great chance to make our family rise even higher.”

“B-But, that’s—”

“Which is why, Kouki…” I cut his line before he could say another word, “Which is why I wonder… Why did I run away from home, even if I already know it is for the sake of the family?”

He stood still upon hearing my words; his mouth wide opened in aghast. Looking at his face right now, I couldn’t help but smile, while it also pained me at the same time.

“You have my heart confused, Kouki,” I looked at the pair of brown spheres in his eyes, “If you hadn’t asked me what I’d like to become in the future, perhaps I wouldn’t be as perturbed.”

“W-What do you mean?”

“It was the first time someone ever asked me what I actually want to do. Did you know that?”

I could see the entirety of the future. However, no matter what I did, all I could see in my future was the same narrow path with no freedom of my own. It had been decided. It had been written for me and I was not allowed to change it. If anything, even my own will had been dictated from the start, that everything must be for the sake of obtaining victory. But then, for the first time since I was born, someone came and asked me.

 

_“What do you want to do?”_

 

It was the words that blew all reasons out of my mind. Just with such simple question, he made me realized that even I had a choice I could make for my own life. Though… It was unfortunate…that I was already…

“S-Sei…”       

I looked at him as he called my name. I thought he was steaming up that his cheeks became red,  but before I could make any comment out of it, all of a sudden he took both my hands from my coat’s pocket and pulled me up to stand before him.

“C-C-C-Cancel the engagement!” he stuttered as he spoke those words, even though his eyes seemed to be already dead set on a goal, “I-It’s not going to work out. I know it won’t. Even the girl is probably forced into this, just like you.”

“Yes? And what do I do then if I cancel the engagement?”

To be honest, I hadn’t expected him to say that, which was why I couldn’t think of anything to make a proper comeback. However, it appeared that he hadn’t spoken everything in his mind yet.

“Y-Your family’s company can still rise and shine even without you two marrying each other. After all, the heir who’s going to inherit everything is you. Right, Sei?” he continued while staring straight into my eyes, as though he was glaring at me, “Isn’t it the duty of an Akashi to always win? Even if you’re thrown into the depths of hell, you’ll just rise back up and become the king of hell. Isn’t that right?”

For a few seconds, I was rather dumbfounded at his blatant remark. However, it was before long that felt this urge to let out a laugh, although I had to suppress it into a chuckle lest he was going to get even more embarrassed.

“Goodness, Kouki… Is that how you’ve always seen me? As someone capable of becoming the king of hell?”

“N-N-No, that’s not what I— Anyway, I meant to say that you’d do well on your own without getting a help from the engagement,” he quickly replied with his face turning red all the way to his ears, “And… And… You can also become a Shogi player if you want. All you have to do is participate in tournaments when you’re free, right?”

That sort of thought… It would never have crossed my mind if he hadn’t mentioned it. He looked plain and rather cowardly, but such simplicity eventually became the one that saved me from this dictated fate of mine.

“I will give it a try then…” I let out a sigh as I spoke.

“Try…what?”

“That Shogi Player of Miracle you spoke of before… Hadn’t I told you it does not sound too far-fetched?” with a chuckle, I gazed straight into his eyes, “But I do need something, though. Will you grant me my little wish, Kouki?”

“Of course. If it’s within my power, I’ll do anything,” he replied vigorously. That bright, thoughtless smile… I’d like to see your face once you had heard my next words.

“Then stay with me, Kouki,” I said without shifting my gaze, “That is all I ask of you.”

His reaction, indeed, was never beyond my expectations, but it was still amusing nonetheless. To start with, his hands that were holding onto mine began to sweat even in this unquestionably cold weather. And with that burning red face, he stuttered as he asked.

“I-I-If I stay with you, wh-what am I supposed to do then?”

“Well, let’s see here…” without a pause, I took a step closer towards him and put a finger on under his chin, “Why don’t we continue where our date left off?”

“H-Huh?”

“What do people on our age usually do at the end of a date? I am not familiar with these customs, so… Would you mind enlightening me?”

“Y-Y-You… Well… You know… _That_ … You understand…right?”

“I haven’t the slightest idea. What is _that_? Could you show me how it’s done, Kouki?”

“S…Seeeeeeiiiii!!!!”

And with that, it appeared that I had dealt the last blow as he lunged towards me with both arms nearly squeezing me in. I had no idea that he was actually quite strong, but even at this little unexpected fact, I could only smile and returned his embrace. Did I finally cry, now that my mind and heart were finally relieved? I wouldn’t know… I could see the entirety of the future, and it was but a simple matter to change it. However, right now, he was the one who changed it for me, so the least I could do was to whisper those words to his bright red ear.

 

_“Thank you, Kouki.”_


End file.
